Please Help Me To Heal
by Feline Thoughts
Summary: Sometimes.. life becomes too much. IsabelMichael. Set after Departure.


Two silhouettes were seen in the desert that night, seated side by side as they attempted to sort out their lives. Earlier that day, all four of them were supposed to go home. Their so-called home was full of lies, and disaster; enemies that wanted to torture them the minute they landed, and if the information wasn't used to help them conquer other worlds, then the four would be dead without a second's notice. Max had been willing to give Roswell up, to belong somewhere with _Tess_. But, he hadn't, and neither had Isabel. At least out of the four, he and Isabel had a head on their shoulders; an apparent conscious for things.

He glanced toward the woman sitting beside them, his best friend's sister. It seemed like yesterday that the only thing she was worrying about was what eyeliner matched her mini skirt. Now, their problems over the last two years had evolved so much, even he wished the three of them could just go back. A small glimpse of Maria flashed into his brain, causing unshed tears to shine from those chocolate depths. He had no idea what to do anymore, how to even go on anymore. It wasn't just his life at stake anymore, Alex had been killed because of their secret; the one man who loved Isabel as much as himself, and he'd been killed without a blink by Max's _wife_. Even he couldn't believe their lives progress from that day Max had saved Liz Parker two years ago, risking their lives as much as his own for someone to love; somewhere to _belong_.

He cleared his throat, arms pulling his knees to his chest as he rocked himself back and forth somewhat to calm the thoughts in his head. Here he was, Michael Guerin, on the verge of sobbing in front of Isabel. He had obvious reasons for losing himself, but he never imagined something as mediocre as this; as _human_ as this. And then he realized that if he tried, he could be human. If he tried his hardest, he'd belong, it would just take some time. He had plenty of time.

He stared straight ahead, forcing himself to clear his throat again, oblivious to Isabel's calm exterior. She hadn't flinched once since she'd got there, and he was fidgeting like he'd just had a cherry coke with Tabasco in it. He had invited her there, to listen and help him find his way again. That had yet to happen, what with them just glancing at each other every five minutes to make sure the other was breathing.

He trusted her, simple as that; so, without a second thought, he started to ramble.

'' I'm scared, Isabel. I've never been more frightened of something in my whole life, and I find myself wondering if I'm doing the right thing. Max hadn't even flinched at the granolith, we all hadn't. If it weren't for Maria, I would be on our home planet right now where some stranger would have me locked in a padded room to torture me. I killed Pierce for hurting Max and almost exposing us, and if it weren't for Nasedo we wouldn't be here right now. I just, '' He paused to take a breath, feeling a tear run down his cheek to his chin somewhere in between breaths. He shook his head to clear it, not wanting to show Isabel weakness; the one emotion he felt more of than any other, and clenched his jaw to relax. This was his moment, and he'd have it with or without his fears interfering. '' I just, feel like the last person who belongs here anymore, '' he finished in a mid whisper, looking down at his feet as more tears fell; not hearing Isabel getting to her feet to come and put her arms around him, to understand him.

'' Michael, '' Isabel whispered, next to his ear. Her arms were now around his shoulders, supporting his weight as he leaned on her. She stroked his hair, letting him just lean on her for awhile. She felt his tears wetting her shoulder, his silent sobs wrecking his body with spasms. He didn't censor himself around her, and she didn't ever want him to. '' You belong with us, Michael. Max and I aren't home without you. He's my brother, but he has Liz now; and you have Maria. You stayed behind for her, and helped us from going somewhere none of us wanted to go, Michael. Don't you get that you saved us, _again_? Your love is so strong, Michael. People get lost in that kind of love. '' It's then, that she gives a little half smile. Tears have now begun to run down her cheeks, her fingers still in his hair. '' You're the dream, that everyone wants to live but no one knows is out there, Michael. Make Roswell your dream. ''

He didn't know it, but soon he was staring at her. He never had to make her understand him, he'd never asked for it to happen between them; their connection was so strong, as was their love and understanding. He knew she was the first person he'd go to for help, and she knew he was the first person she'd go to beside her own brother. It didn't matter now, his problems, because he knew Isabel could see him as clearer than he'd ever been seen, by anyone before. She was the first person who'd ever seen him like that, and still loved him. He stared at her, wanting to hear her speak, about anything. Alex, Grant; _something_.

He watched as she smiled behind the tears, her own problems far worse than his own. He felt her hand on his cheek, wiping the drying tears from his face. '' Is?'' He asked, but instead of answering, she laughed; a simplistic laugh that symbolized her attempt at good nature. '' I'm fine, Michael. Honest. '' She smiled again, and he felt her hands over his face; wiping his tears, and fixing his hair. He knew she was trying to help him look better for when he went back to Maria, to be strong for her like she'd suggested he should.

But as he watched Isabel, his brother's sister and his other best friend, smiling so falsely behind tears that held clumps of mascara, his heart ached. He couldn't leave her, couldn't let her go home and sob into her pillow. He knew she wouldn't be with Kyle, as a rebound for Alex. He knew she thought of him with a better regard other than rebound. But all that didn't matter because Michael felt his heart breaking at the sight of Isabel Evans fixing him so he'd leave her and go home to Maria. This was killing him.

'' Is, please. '' He whispered, chocolate depths pleading with her to tell him something of how she was feeling. It wasn't right that she was bottling all this inside her; that was what he did, she shouldn't have to.

He watched her shake her head, another laugh following that, and once more a false smile grazed her lips.

'' Go home, Michael. Take Maria out for a late night movie, or something. '' She scanned his appearance, smiling once more after that. '' You look gorgeous, and I'm sure she misses you. ''

'' Is, not now. I'm not leaving you here like this. '' He got to his feet, moving closer to her until he was in her face, reading her once again. '' I love you, Isabel. Maria knows that. I'm not leaving until I can make sure you're safe, because if I do and you're not, I swear I won't leave you alone until you're old and have gray hair which I'm sure, you'd dye blonde again just to look five years younger. '' A laugh emerged from Isabel, making him smile a bit. '' You're my home, Is. I need to protect you and Max with everything I am, and I'm not leaving until you tell me what's going on with you. ''

Once again, she shook her head. She watched his face fall, and stood on her toes to kiss his cheek.

'' I'm fine, go home. '' She repeated, just before she turned and started toward the Evans's household. Michael's nose flared, as he knew she wouldn't tell him. She was stubborn, just like him. Sometimes he liked that about her; other times, not so much. He reached her in two long strides, spinning her to face him and bringing his lips to hers in a solid clunk. He saw flashes of what she was feeling, and Alex. She still was thinking of Alex. Pulling back minutes later, he watched her collapse in his arms and start sobbing. That a girl, he thought as he held her. He hated seeing her hurt, and knew he'd just hurt Maria by kissing Isabel just then. He loved Maria, but if she got jealous over that, then he'd explain it to her later.

'' I just miss him so much, '' she whispered into his shirt. '' I was so stupid, hurting him Michael. A-and then she killed him, M-Max's wife, a-and. . . . '' '' I know, Is. '' He whispered, stroking her hair as he held her. It wasn't right, Isabel being hurt. It killed him so much to see her like this. He just held her, whispering everything he could think of into her ear until she started laughing. A real laugh, unlike the others. He found himself starting to laugh with her, until they both laughed so hard they started crying again. He just stood there, holding her in his arms for the longest time. She was the most beautiful, caring woman he'd ever known aside from Maria, and his opinion of her would never change. He didn't realize they both had fallen to sleep until morning came, and the sun rose above them; encircling them with warmth.

He watched her waking up soon after he did, and smiled again.

'' .. . . Okay, Michael, now you can go. I'm sure Maria's freaking out, or something, '' Isabel greeted him, smiling as he burst out laughing. He nodded, rising to his feet and taking her with him. '' No more tears?'' He asked arms at his sides as he studied her. She smiled, nodding toward him her agreement. '' If any start, I'll call you, '' she said, moving in to hug him one last time. He smiled against her cheek, moving back some to place a chaste kiss on her lips. He knew it was about time he'd better go, even if last night was one of the better moments in his life. He cleared his throat, brown eyes softer as he looked at her with a smile.

'' I love you Isabel. ''

She smiled, letting out a rare giggle before shaking the rest of her giggle fest away and meeting his eyes again. She knew he was smiling from the inside out, the one smile he had yet to show Maria. She loved that he was happier now, as opposed to before when she was happy and he was alone. She understood that now.

Understood it, and welcomed it with all the love in the world.

'' I love you too, Michael. ''

The End.


End file.
